Dear You

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Dear You,

 

It’s been years since the last time we talked, but I know you still remember me. I hope you do. But if you do, how come we never talk anymore? It’s kinda sad but, well… I hope you’re doing okay with your life.

You seem to be okay though… At least, that’s my assumption seeing your facebook page every time you got something new on your timeline (that’s what they call it now). That makes me sound like a stalker, but who cares? Do you? I believe you don’t mind if I take a look at your profile once or twice a week, just to catch up with your days… And you know what? You look even more and more beautiful each day.

I miss you.

Well, I didn’t know that I could feel something like this. I mean, I knew, but I didn’t knew that I would still feel it after years have gone by. I miss our little meaningless conversation. I miss our awes every time we found ourselves have done or bought something so similar. I miss having you being around… I miss your Macaroni Schotel. I made a penne schotel for this Christmas party with my friends, but it’s nothing compared to your macaroni schotel.

I mean it.

How come we never talk anymore?

It crosses my mind every time I looked at your picture on facebook. Seriously. How come?

It’s like we got so close and suddenly everything’s gone. Was it when I changed school? Was it after that? And why?

I don’t know your reason, but mine is a bit different.

I can’t be close to you because it would be complicated. It would be complicated for me, and especially for you. And, moreover it’s you, and I don’t want to complicate us because what we had was so beautiful. Beautiful enough to make me back off and let everything like it is. I don’t want to ruin it.

I don’t want to confuse you. Especially, at that moment I was confused myself. And probably, the one who brought the confusion was you. Because you were around and gave me the feeling I didn’t know would ever existed.

And again, it’s complicated because it was you.

If it was someone else, it might be easier. It could be so much easier.

Anyways, it doesn’t even matter anymore. Since we don’t talk, there’s nothing to be worried about.

I might still see you once in a while on facebook. I might enjoy your pretty picture with some cheeky comments on it. I could have a look a little bit longer if the feeling stroke again. I might get a little bit stung when you said something I never expected. However, it wouldn’t change a thing between us.

Not that I don’t want thing to change. I want it.

I mean, I want you to talk to me again. I want to connect with you like we used to. I might change my mind about relationship if it leads somewhere else, but… Yeah.

Anyway… I don’t know what you’re doing today, right now. But I hope you enjoyed your holiday. I believe you did a great job this year and you’ll rock even more next year.

Merry Christmas and Happy New year 🙂

 

Love,

BYQ

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2 responses

  1. Oucchhh Byg … Once I said, “What if things were different?” to “someone”, and he said, “There is no “if” in a real world.” … and he left me heartbroken …

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