If Justin Bieber Was My Son…

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Okay, I would never be a mother of a Justin Bieber, but I was inspired by a question my friend asked me yesterday when we were out to a music store. He told me that Justin Bieber is young enough to be my son, which was an incorrect statement, unless I had a ‘terrible accident’ when I was in Junior High School. He’s only a year younger than my youngest brother. D o h.

But anyway… He asked me in the end what I would do if I was Justin Bieber’s Mother.

I knew it was silly, but I gave it a thought, especially I’ve been studying about Tiger Mother for months for my dissertation. So, these are what came out when I thought about it:

1. If Justin Bieber was my son, he would be an Asian. Chinese descent. Well, or half Chinese, depends on who the sperm donor would be. I might not name him Justin. If you insist to give him a name started with “J”, it would probably be Jason or Jimmy… or Jackie Chan, or Jet Li. Definitely not Justin.

2. Based on the fact #1, it is unlikely he would end up singing on youtube. Chances are he would be studying his ass off to get to the best university in the country because he would be astrophysicist, geneticist, or neurosurgeon. Or if he doesn’t want to be a doctor or a scientist he might want to consider law or business school. Unless he’s as cool as his mum and want to study language and culture… *sigh deeply silently*

3. Or, oh well, if he’s really can’t excel at school and after thousands of counselings I found out that his talent is in music… He would still not be singing on Youtube, godammit. He would have to learn instrument, and I will give him as much freedom to choose: Piano? Or Violin?

Piano or Violin, Son?

Guitar is fine… *inhale deeply*. But remember, it doesn’t mean that I am being soft, it’s just because if Justin Bieber was my son, I wouldn’t let him to collaborate with Usher or Ludacris. If he played guitar and being a REAL rock star instead of being a youtube star, instead of singing nonsense about infants, he can start covering OASIS song and maybe *trying so hard not to sing after a ‘maybe’* he would be able to be in the same stage with the GOD himself. I would be a really proud mum.

Noel Gallagher and His Epiphone Supernova

4. And if Justin Beiber was my son he wouldn’t have time for any relationship. Seriously… pursuing a M.D. and mastering guitar like GOD, he wouldn’t even have time to tweet about it.

So, back to the question, if I was the mother of this child, what would I do? Would I be proud? Would I be happy? It is not so easy to say, since I wouldn’t want to have a child star as my son. I would be proud of course, but even if he wasn’t a child star, I would be proud anyway (because he would be a neurosurgeon, of course). I wouldn’t raise a Justin Beiber, that’s for sure. I wouldn’t let that happen… _

 

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4 responses

  1. I love.. I LOVE … I really LOVE this post …
    As an Indonesian who spent most of my school years in Indonesian Catholic School, I could vividly imagine the case…
    Ps. I am thinking of sharing this post to my friends … could I?

    Like